School is out. The hoard is gone. There is peace on “the Hill.” Time for some totally non-sensical fun. How about starting with Hulk Hands?
There they were laying on the floor of Kansas Athletics video operation, Rock Chalk Video. Those green fists of fury would have called to me even if I was not a fan of the hysterically funny Big Bang Theory. As a fan though, Sheldon’s Dr. Bruce Banner transformation into the giant Hulk last season meant I had to try them.
Sheldon’s raging Hulk cry of “puny humans” rang in my ears. A picture was mandatory and sent immediately to Laura. Her hilarious reply came filled with true spirit of the moment.
“You will have a difficult time unhooking a bra with those monsters,” she texted.
Just as fast came my testosterone-fueled answer. “Hulk does not unhook. Hulk shreds bras.” Ha-ha-ha!
The true life reality is that I wish sometimes I was the Hulk and could toss the cars of idiot drivers on campus into the Chi Omega Fountain at will. Surviving another year without an accident is as amazing as surviving the old Figure 8 races on the Wide World of Sports from the Islip Speedway in New York. Round and round you go, where the next car will come from you never know.
The true terror is an Asian student behind the wheel of a car. They either can’t drive and are totally confused or act like rally racers, such as the two Asians in an expensive Audi this past fall. Racing up the parking garage ramp the wrong way heading directly towards me with their lights blinking, they hoped I somehow would miraculously disappear. That day proved an Audi has good brakes since their brake rotors burned as brightly red as my face filled with terror and anger when I failed to vanish.
Do not try to go politically correct on me. Anyone that has done any driving on campus honestly knows I am correct. There is a reason Godzilla keeps attacking Japan. He is sick and tired of their driving. Why else would Godzilla throw cars in the movie posters or swat away planes, surely being piloted just as badly as the cars at KU.
Even worse are the mentally muddled student pedestrians. With heads down, ears filled with Dr. Dre or Skull Candy headphones and the words “pedestrians have the right of way” at the tip of their tongues, they brazenly plunge into the street never looking. Hunched over by the weight of their book bags, their heads occasionally emerge from their hoodies in shock that anyone might actually be making a turn before their blind step from a curb.
Then there are the law students that share the same parking garage with Kansas Athletics. Intersections mean nothing to these future litigators filled with just enough jurisprudence to be dangerous. As they cross the street from the law school in waves to save themselves a few much-needed steps, their purpose seems clear. Get hit, sue and pay off their life-stifiling student loans.
Yet, by Sunday afternoon the beast in me calmed. The drive past the dorms on Daisy Hill revealed empty parking lots and a quietness that can only be savored for a few short months. There really are no adequate words to explain the joy that sight brings.
Unfortunately, there was no joy in Mudville Sunday as the mighty Jayhawks struck out against Kansas State. I love baseball. Laura loves baseball – especially the guys in baseball uniforms. We both think the world of skipper Ritch Price and many of the players. The weekend series against the Wildcats was as crazy as the weather.
The Friday game in Manhattan saw KU pitchers give up six walks, hit six batters and surrender 14 hits, dragging on for well over four hours. Saturday featured two weather delays on a night where storms ravaged communities on all sides of Lawrence. Meanwhile, despite tornado and lightening warnings, Hoglund Ballpark barely saw a rain drop. By the time the senior ceremony concluded Sunday, pain was evident everywhere.
Now, there is only one more track meet this week in soggy Eugene, Oregon, to cap off the year’s events. June will be busy with work for next year’s media guides, but the pace eases. Laura and I will again grow familiar with our favorite cycling routes outside Lawrence and Topeka and discover the joys of a nap again.
Beat is the best word I can use to describe my feelings now. If I could be induced into a coma for a few days of rest, I would. The adrenal glands are about tapped. This junkie is about to go into withdrawal which is never pretty. The certainty is that the drug which is my photography at KU remains the greatest rush of all. I am about all out.
For now, as another year of shooting so many great events takes its toll, I feel like Sheldon in the Big Bang Theory when he said, “Hulk sad!”